Quotes of the Day: Because context is for sissies.

October 16th
Angie: Being dumb, that's okay. But being dumb and talking?

September 28th
Professor Yann-Hang Lee (Giving advice on presentations): You can walk around and approach the audience. (I don't mean you should dance around, but if you do it, I wouldn't mind at all).

April 20th
Greg (In a Tibetan monk style chant): Sometimes this thesis gives me a lalala boner...

February 14th
Ty: Would you still love me if I liked countr-
Angie: Absolutely not.

October 22nd
[16:36] idreamidrive: do you want to be at a company with a lot of emplyes that don't even know eachother or a small company with a family type atmosphere
[16:37] Cheesehound 42: tons of people and tons of dollahs
[16:37] idreamidrive: lol
[16:37] idreamidrive: money isn't everything tyrus
[16:38] Cheesehound 42: say that to me in ten years when I'm sitting in my chair made of gold plated hookers.

August 26th
Art (after Tony tells him of his engagement): Oh! You just pissed your dick to the wind!

July 3rd
Random little girl in Carpenteria: Look at my mommy! Look at my mommy!! LOOK AT MY MOMMY!!!
Angie (frightened): I see her, I see her!

June 25th
Ty's mom: Is that a mountain?
Ty's dad: Nooo, those are clouds.
Ty's mom: No, no, it's connected to the ground.
Ty's dad:Oh. That's a mountain.

May 25th
Subway Clerk: Will that be all? Do you want to make it a combo and get chips and a drink?
TJ: No, just a no profit sandwich please.

May 25th
TJ: Why can't everyday be meatball day?!?!

March 26th
Random guy at Denny's, when asked if he had any bacon: No way! If I had bacon, I would jihad this restaurant because it aggrevates me!

March 26th
Brock: Why are my bacon and tomato outside my bread? Oh well, I'm not worried...I'll just send it home.

Fat Tuesday
Shady-ass guy in the parking lot outside Eatza Pizza: Hey man, you like loans?

December 22nd
Ty: Ah, pooping. It's the shit.

December 18th
Joel: I begged my parents for an Easy Bake oven but they got me Creepy Crawlers instead.

December 13th
Tony, after discussing the meaning of the license plate KC7CTR with Ty and the Booch: Before I die, I want someone to give me the Kansas City seven seater.

December 3rd
Art, referring to Tony: We're going to break in his pussy.

November 21st
Ty: I slept last night.
Tony: Really? What was it like? I don't remember. Tell me about it!
Ty: Yeah, five hours! I drooled on my pillow.

November 21st
Tony: I'm staring not at the Mountain Dew, not at the keyboard, but riiight inbetween.

August 30th
Ty: I have no manners (Neither Ty nor Tony can remember the context for this but it was golden)

August 29th
Professor Yann-Hang Lee: When you golf you hit hard, then you think of killing yourself.

August 15th
TJ, while smelling a wine bottle: ...let's just get krunky somewhere...

July 20th
Ty's mom: I feel so great because I'm on pain pills. Wee!

Early summer
Ty's dad: Gilmore Girls is on soon!

May 5th
Tony: I'll finish one more section, study some CSE, shoot myself, and go to bed. Hopefully I'll bleed to death by morning.
It's funny because it's terrifying. We <3 finals!

April 25th
Ty: They (the school) made my parents fill out a form saying I wasn't retarded once.

April 21st
Tony: All roads lead to Rome, and Rome is disappointment!

March 19th
(Dave, Art and Greg are standing in the kitchen as their neighbor Alex walks by.)
Art: Did we make enough food that Alex can come have a beer?

January 24th
Art: I just tickled my prostate...

December 10th
JP (intoxicated and just found a baseball glove with a ball in it): Come on Kyle...let's go outside and see if you can catch this without no hands...
(This phrase was then used at the end of almost every sentence for the remainder of that evening)

November 10th
Zoe (Greg and Art's neighbor): I'm not gonna lie about it...sweaters make balls.

November 11th
Ty: Well, I kind of caught myself and scrambled with my hands before letting my chin hit the ground.
Doctor: You didn't catch yourself good enough.

October 22nd
Tony: For enough money, I would not go to the bathroom.

October 15th
Ty: My burrito juiced my shorts!

October 15th
Mr. Hoffman: When you place the brick on top, these two blobs of mortar splooge out. You then scrap it away; this is called "tooling the joint".

October 14th
Mallory: That was quick.
Marcy: Yeah, it didn't come out.

September 10th
Greg: Yeah, Dave's about as Mexican as Taco Bell.

September 6th
Becky: What happened?
Tony: Ty said "Fudd my Ruckers". It was funny.

September 1st
Ann: Sometimes I forget to breathe, and I get lightheaded, and my heart starts to beat really fast. It happens like 8 times a day.

August 26th
Dave: My long sexy hair is getting in my face, and tickling my nose.

August 21st
Emily's mom: Art, your shirt's wrinkled!
(Art checks his shirt worriedly)

August 20th
Art:That was my worst erection ever!

June 5th
TJ: Greg, stop fondling your nuts.
Greg: This is a nice pocket.

May 13th
Tony (muffled, after putting a teaspoon of sample orange toothpaste in his mouth): Aaw! Too much!

May 12th
(Ty is running in circles around Tony and Greg as the three walk to Sahuaro)
Greg to Tony: I'm the proton, you're the neutron and Ty is the fuckin' electron.

May 10th
While watching Family Feud - the question is what women have a hard time getting rid of
Some dumb broad: A house!
Greg: Apparently you have a hard time getting rid of being stupid.

May 8th
John: Look, I'm a tuna! AAARRRG! (jumps into a volleyball net)

May 7th
Ty (deep preaching tone, after showering): Every pore from high to low has been dealt a cleansing blow! I smelled so bad you thought I'd died, but here I stand, hygienified!

May 6th
Art: I washed all of my boxers today, but I still don't think I'm gonna wear any.

May 1st
Guest Quote of the Day by Minus 200: Criticism is like cough syrup. I hate taking it, but it's usually good for me. Also, no one takes cough syrup from strangers.

April 30th
Una chica later ID'd as Lindsey to Ty: You are so incredibly attractive to me.
Ty: *Gives a two-finger salute*

April 29th
Ian: Mom, I'm not even really paying attention to what you're saying so I'm gonna go. *hangs up*

April 26th
Art(Singing to Arnold as the Terminator): Your penis is so huge... I looove you.

April 20th
Greg: (Singing to the 'Anaconda' tune from Time Splitters 2) "Skeet, Skuh, Skeet, da-da-deet, Skeet, Skuh, Skeet, da-da-deet..."
Art: Oh...Where IS Dave?

April 19th
Greg: Art, do you have any ties here at the dorms?
Art: Yeah, one.
Greg: What color is it?
Art: Pink... ("oh Art" laughter from us)... well, it's more of a fuschia.

April 17th
-Ian (In the study room) Why's there so much water in here? Is somebody in the Bangin' Room or something?

April 13th
-Tony (amidst a Sahuaro chunk down on Buffalo Wings): I wish there were a way to stick this whole thing in my mouth and pull out nothing but the bones... (Tony proceeds to deepthroat his wing, pulling out nothing but bones) That was the coolest thing I've ever done!!

April 5th
-Ty (at Taco Bell): Hello, I'll have all of your burritos.
...
-Tony (on his 7 layer burrito): Four of these layers are beans!

April 4th
(Greg, Tony, Dave and Art, watching "In The Cut", currently Meg Ryan is getting her ass eaten)
-Dave: (talking as Meg Ryan) It's Friday, I can't eat meat.

April 1st
-Tony (from bed): So what exactly are we doing wrong?
-Hall Director Lady: You can't move university furniture into a sand pit

April 1st
-Robot (Ty) to Ian: What the f***, man! Stop creaming my pants!

March 29th
-Tony: I just stuck a lion paw up your robot ass

March 28th
-Ty: Joel, why aren't you spending your last hour here lying in the grass naked?

March 26th
-Ian: Oh, fuck! AAAARRRHaaaaa
Ian did this for roughly five hours straight

March 26th
-Tony: Being a minuteman is awesome!
Tony ensures us that this is a purely hypothetical statement

March 25th
-Tony: Titties and gravy!
an adjective which rivals the cat's pajamas

March 24th
-Tony: Brown thunder, go! ARRRRRGH!

March 10th
-James: Today I was playing a game with myself, it's called Count The Pleated Skirts. I got to 46 just on Palm walk...
-John: I know! I feel like a walking boner.

March 9th
- Tony to Art: (opens the Bangin' Room door) Dude I totally just caught you watching Teletubbies! You're so caught!